Saturday, March 10, 2007

haan zara nalayak hain...haan pitne ke layak hain

randomn weird guy: *smilingly* Hi
me: err..bye
m: did u just say bye?
me: yea, to random pple i usually respond hi's with bye's
m: wat about a bye?
me: good question. u think it should be a hi?

alrite, im just kidding one shouldnt answer the "bye". this incident happened in one of the major desi shopping areas in dubai. eveteasing (i hate that word, but i dont know a good subsitute so ill just use it) is quite common here and i suppose in any big city it happens. sometimes pple will react differently to these situations. mostly people will ignore and the problem will go away. some cases people will glare back and the person will get scared and go away. sometimes another person will intervene and scare the person off. in very rare cases people will go upto the person and give them two . mostly coz you are yourself embarassed to "create a scene". so you seethe inside and wish they would go away. the solution that solves itself.

sadly, sometimes there are no solutions. a relative was once driving back home after her on call nite duty at the hospital and in those days the road in dubai at nite were practically empty. those days mobile phones werent as common as now. some car chased her for a good 20 mins and finally overtook her and flashed their number. how do u combat that? you cant possibly stop the car coz you are so freaked out and secondly driving fast can be dangerous for you. at the most you can try to ignore and keep driving.

a friend of mine in school had a stalker who stood outside her house for 3 continous days. my advise to her was to make it clear to the stalker you arent interested ("throw a stone wrapped in a message that reads next time im aiming for your head" - just kidding i dont advise that as tempting it might be , nowadays with people sueing you left and right, lenei kei denei nahin ho jaye.) and then if they dont get the hint to just plain ignore. but like lot of people, my friend is scared but is curious to know whether the person is still out there. so she would end up peering outside her window. finally she told her dad, and thankfully her dad gave him a good lecture and he disappeared. thankfully her parent did not blame her. in continuation of my posts of ads, i recently saw this ad of a rickshaw driver staring at a women passenger at the back, who had no idea that the man was staring at her . her mother in law who was sitting next to her saw the man staring at her daughter in law, she immediately stopped the rickshaw got out and slapped the daughter in law. like it was her fault that the rickshaw driver was a jerk. this is very common.and sometimes has lasting effects on you.

an aunt of mine when younger was chased by this fellow, and ever since then she has a fear of these eve-teasers. recently, we were shopping at this store and the salesman was being overtly friendly with her, i know it was no harm it was just the sales person being curious and i suppose since we have the same mother tongue he was interested to know more about our whereabouts. when we got out the shop, i saw him following us out of the shop, probably to have a smoke or somethign, god knows. but me being all evil and all was to my aunt he's following us, your ashiq awara. she got so freaked out and kept looking back. the fear stemming from her childhood days. i felt very guilty after that. and have never repeated anything like this after that.

so wat is the solution to these situations. each his own, i think. if ignoring the person works, good enough. if not, some sarcastic comment. or a firm "raasta napo" (get out of my way)lecture. but if the person tries to get too close, a good slap in full public is key. after all such nalayk types are pitnei kei layk (meant to be beaten up)


Ashraf's Pen 7:26 AM  


This post remind me of an experience my mom once told me about.
She and her cousin had gone to a fair in their college just next door. It was their late teens.
There after some time they realized that a rather skinny youth was following them around, making wierd passes. THis angered them both and they decided to teach the guy a lesson.
Mom looked at the guy smiled and said hi.
Then in the same tone she said can I have your hands. Immediately mom gripped them firmly while the other cousin had secretely straightened two dupatta pins(the pointed types) which she immediately used to ferociously jab the guy on his hands.
By the time he realized whom he had met I think twelve plus jabs had already occured.

Not the ideal response but I am sure the guy would never ever forget it

life of pi 9:19 AM  

lol, ashraf thats hilarous. dupatta pins attack! wat a weapon! im sure at that point of time it must have been pretty scary. and im sure that guy learnt his lesson. at least staying clear of dupatta wearing ladies. i have to say your mom and her cousin are really very cool =)

Ashraf,  1:42 AM  

Yup, they are.

And there are loads of other stories.

But that would be a whole bunch of tales in themselves

life of pi 10:10 AM  

all the more reason for you to blog about it!

Ashraf,  8:13 AM  

B.T.W. there is a movement called Project Blank Noise. Its India centric but its interesting. It aims to establish eve-teasing as a crime.

See my post on it if you are interested.

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