tum saath na do.. toh kya mein kahoon

i think one of the hardest things in life is to be optimistic. so i try. i try my hardest. to be so. i try when things are threatening to fall around me. i still try, albeit a period of brooding, i try. sometimes, i wonder also why i try. i wonder, if things are really meant to be, they will be and why does one have to try so hard shouldn't it all fit into place like your unplanned life to this point.

so, i think i'm letting fear eat me. fear of losing. fear of losing something that i possibly didn't deserve. fear of losing something that i possibly don't deserve. and sometimes its nothing but this fear, this fear of the future that binds you. that stops you from doing what you should do. and what you really want to do.

you know it. but you will not do anything until you realize its too late anyway.

updated: i do realize i sound like a frickin fortune cookie, and no not even those good ones that you keep in your wallet since they made your day. just those random ones, which you will read months later and be like what does this mean..ie what was i even blogging about.